Monday, October 03, 2005

It All Started...



It all started after I dropped Cain off at football practice. I came home in a rush (should've went to the restroom before I took Cain to practice), left my keys in the front door, plugged up my dying phone, and hurried to the restroom. I closed the bathroom door and did my thing, washed my hands and started out of the door. That's when I heard a little snap that sounded like, "TwING!"

I stood for a moment, thinking surely that "twing" couldn't be what I thought it was. So I twisted the doorknob and guess what? Nothing. I was stuck in the bathroom. The doorknob spring had broken or popped or whatever doorknobs do when they break.

My first reaction was to laugh and wiggle the doorknob. Then I stood there.

I do NOT do well in enclosed spaces. I remembered that my sweet little neighbor was across the street on her front porch with two other people so I started yelling for help. Then I remembered that I had also taken the floor fan in the living room and turned it on full blast. They couldn't hear me yelling. I still gave it another 10 minutes or so just to make sure. I beat on the door and then stood there.

All sorts of things were going through my mind. I knew that no-one would be home until around 8 p.m. or so (and it was only 3 p.m.). I would be stuck in the bathroom for hours. What if a robber saw my keys in the door and stole my car? What if the house caught on fire? What if I ran out of toilet paper?

I tried to pry the door open but had no luck. Then I decided I'd pretend it wasn't happening so I threw away some almost-empty hairspray bottles, shampoos, old lotion, etc. When they found me at least my bathroom would be clean. I'd stop cleaning and yell some more. I assure you that although you may want to laugh, that this isn't or wasn't funny. I could hear my phone ringing and it was my hubby's ring. I'd think, "Surely he'll be worried that I'm not answering and he'll drive home before he drives to practice to check on me." Ha!

Finally, after about an hour and a half later, (I know because I was marking the half-hours with q-tips) I found some scissors way back in one of the drawers. I ripped the molding (is that what it's called?) off the door frame and rammed the scissors through the hole to pop the door lock. I only cut my fingers a little bit but finally the door opened! I was so happy I may have cried a little bit.

When I came out the door my kitten was sitting there in the hall with her head cocked like a dog looking at me. I thanked her for her no-help-whatsoever attitude and told her that dogs were better pets. I then called my husband and assured him that I was ok, thank goodness, no thanks to him either!

I'm astonished at how my hubby, my daughter, my mother, my son, and my good ol' pal Kandi laughed at my horrible story. You can ask them all: I didn't laugh. I didn't think it was funny at all. Imagine your worst nightmare coming true-that's how I felt about being stuck in the bathroom. It wasn't fun.

The doorknob is now sitting on the sink so if you come over and need to go the bathroom, you'll be safe. I can promise you that.

5 comments:

Ledford Photography said...

I proudly admit that I laughed like a sumbeech. That may be the funniest thing I've ever heard in my 23 years on this earth. I think of it now and still... I laugh. No worries though, if I ever get stuck in the crapper, feel free to laugh your way to a whole new face!!!

rachelpennington said...

Oh ha ha! Some friend you are! My only consolation was later, and before I had taken the doorknob off, when Cain himself forgot that the knob was broken and couldn't get out after his shower. :D Boy, did I ever laugh then! It was then that I took the doorknob off because I KNEW I'd forget about it and be stuck in there again.

Chrisi said...

I don't consider myself clausterphobic, but that would have freaked me out.

I must confess, I did laugh. :o(

Val Ewing said...

Not funny I suppose, but I surely did get a big grin on my face. Wish I could've been a fly on the wall....

Anonymous said...

WELL IF I HAD TO CHOOSE WHICH ROOM ID WANT TO BE TRAPPED IN , IT WOULD HAVE TO BE THE BATHROOM.
RACHEL, KANDI IS EQUALLY AFRAID OF SNAKES. SHE WILL NOT EVEN WATCH A MOVIE WITH ONE IN IT. THESE LITTLE BITS OF INFO FROM SOMEONE ON THE INSIDE COME IN HANDY FROM TIME TO TIME.